Random Rant

Last night while playing with my laptop, I decided to visit wordpress and scroll down a bit (because I can hardly do that with my android phone). It was, surprisingly, fun because most of the blog posts I’m reading was book reviews from books I haven’t read yet. However, the beautiful night was destroyed after I came across a specific blog post.

It was HORRIBLE. This blogger made a book review and basically copied the way I present my book reviews and did not give any credits (a small “inspired by: knottygeekgirl.wordpress.com would be enough. Or just my name). I’m not sure if I’m the only one in this website who presents book reviews in that specific manner though. Maybe someone from Portugal or Estonia has the same pattern. Well anyway, that’s not my point. My point here is THAT blogger is my friend.. We’re not that close (since we only met at bookstagram) still, I considered him/her (protection purposes) as a friend! But what did she do?! She copied the way I write book reviews, did not give any credits, and is now continuing with his/her life like he/she didn’t commit a crime! I’m just so disappointed with this because I try my very best to make my blog unique. Although I admit I have a few inspirations (i.e., @bibliophilemish and @bookwormaniac from bookstagram) but I’m just inspired by their blogs..then I thought of a way to improvise mine. But this person?! He/she didn’t need to put on the same effort I had because he/she has me. I’ll be the one who’d think of a cute whatever, that person would be the one to have credits. It’s effin disappointing. Hell, it infuriates me whenever I think about his/her posts!

 

Why oh why does people copy the hardwork of other people just so they can have an easy one? 😭😭😭💔💔💔💔💔

Never Never trilogy

Just remember.

Author: Colleen Hoover and Tarryn Fisher

Rating (as a trilogy): 4/5

Started on: January 23, 2016

Finished on: January 25, 2016

Edition: Kindle edition

Genre:  Romace. Young Adult, New Adult, Contemporary, Mystery, Fantasy, Fiction, Suspense, Paranormal

Synopsis (by book):

Never Never part 1

“I may not remember anything about her, but I would bet her smile was my favorite part of her” 

 

Synopsis:

Best friends since they could walk. In love since the age of fourteen.

Complete strangers since this morning.

He’ll do anything to remember. She’ll do anything to forget.

 

Never Never part 2

“Until then, never lose hope. Never stop loving me. Never forget. Never Never,”

 

Synopsis:

 Never forget that I was your first real kiss. Never forget that you’ll be my last.
And never stop loving me between all of them.
Never stop, Charlie.
Never forget.
Silas races against time as more truths unravel, while others twist tighter together. And now, the stakes are higher as Silas’ control slips and others begin to point fingers. Charlie is in trouble and he must be the one to bridge the chasm between their past and their present. Because somewhere between I love yous and Never Nevers and Never Agains, a truth they can’t imagine, beckons to be found.

“Where are you, Charlie?”

 

 

Never Never part 3

“Fate is the magnetic pull of our souls toward the people, places, and things we belong with.”

 

Synopsis:

New York Times bestselling authors Colleen Hoover and Tarryn Fisher are back with the much-anticipated final installment in the Never Never novella series.
Together, Silas Nash and Charlize Wynwood must look deeper into the past to find out who they were and who they want to be. With time ticking down, the couple are in a race to find the answers they need before they lose everything. Can they regain what they once had? And will it restore who they once were?

This trilogy caught my attention from the first time I saw posts on bookstagram regarding these novels. I never read any reviews about Never Never because I wanted to read it naively. The only idea I had was a lot of people was disappointed with the last book. I didn’t try to figure out why because it might give  me an idea of what this trilogy is about. It was worth it, anyway. While I was reading Never Never and after I finished it, I wasn’t influenced by other people’s opinion – which was really nice since I ended up loving the third book .

 

 

“Just remember.”

Charlie and Silas had been best friends since they were born. And like the ordinary human they are, they fell in love with each other.  Despite their corresponding family problems, their love still gained strength and made them survive every issues and problems concerning their family and theirselves. However, certain circumstances came in their way, which forced them to break up,  and let the universe play an evil trick on them.

 

Never Never is yet another novel that will prove readers that soul mates does exist and fate is something people should never, ever play with, or doubt.

 

[P.S.

I made this summary spoiler-free as much as my capabilities would allow, which explains why this review seems so vague and repulsive. I would really encourage the non-reader of this trilogy to read it without much knowledge of what would happened.]

Among these three books, I loved Never Never part 3 the most (excluding the epilogue), and part 2 the least. Part 1 was where the action and eeriness was put in focus, which really made my eyes pop and hunger me for more. Part 2 was when…well this was where my heart was beating rapidly then stopped because of the clichéd twist in its plot. With the last book, however, my heart was able to beat hastily and calmed down at the same time.  I especially loved when Colleen and Tarryn didn’t end the book so sudden, unlike a lot of novels. Never Never part 3 made sure it provided me enough emotions and retorted all of my questions from book 1 up to the last chapter. The only problem with the last book was the epilogue. UGH! The staleness was too much for me to handle.

Broken

You spoke sweet words,

Which my heart couldn’t easily handle.

 

You made solemn promises,

And made me believe they were true.

 

You said every compliment,

My ears wishes to hear every day from everyone.

 

I felt like the queen,

Of such a brave and noble knight.

 

But you left me in the darkest room,

Filled with promises you never consumed.

I wept and hoped you’d come back for me,

But i guess you were just a part of a dream.

 

You once made me happy –

Made me feel whole. I responded to all your plea,

Never realized i was just your tool.

 

Now, my heart is wrecked,

Pained and abandoned.

 

I guess loving is too much,

For my little heart to handle.

November 9

“When you find love, you take it. You grab it with both hands and you do everything in your power not to let it go. You can’t just walk away from it and expect it to linger until you’re ready for it.”

Author: Colleen Hoover

Rating: 5/5

Started on: February 07, 2016

Finished on: February 14, 2016

Edition: UK edition

Genre: New Adult, Romance, Contemporary, Humor, Young Adult, Fiction

Synopsis:

Beloved #1 New York Times bestselling author Colleen Hoover returns with an unforgettable love story between a writer and his unexpected muse.

Fallon meets Ben, an aspiring novelist, the day before her scheduled cross-country move. Their untimely attraction leads them to spend Fallon’s last day in L.A. together, and her eventful life becomes the creative inspiration Ben has always sought for his novel. Over time and amidst the various relationships and tribulations of their own separate lives, they continue to meet on the same date every year. Until one day Fallon becomes unsure if Ben has been telling her the truth or fabricating a perfect reality for the sake of the ultimate plot twist.

 

You’ll never be able to find yourself if you’re lost in someone else.

 

Before reading this wonderfully written and well thought about story, I always wondered why Colleen Hoover is considered as one of the “queens” when it comes to writing great novels. I actually thought they were being overrated. Then this book suddenly came into my shelf and poof! I understood why a lot of bookworms  adore Colleen Hoover so much.

 

After reading Never Never trilogy by Hoover and Fisher, I was eager to read this novel immediately because I witnessed how great her writing style is. Out of all of CoHo’s novels, I chose to read November 9 first because this is her novel with the most intriguing title, and the fact that it’s newly released also adds up to my reason. The great thing about my decision is, I absolutely LOVED Colleen Hoover after this; bad news is, I am craving for MORE of her novels!

 

 

November 9 is a novel about two teenagers – Fallon and Ben – meeting every November 9 each year since they met at a restaurant when they were 18. Fallon O’Neil is a daughter of the famous actor, Donovan O’Neil who seems to love his career and his self, more than his own daughter – who does not have a single ounce of self-confidence since ‘that’ incident happened involving her own father – and her mother. Benton James Kessler is an aspiring writer who has two elder brothers, unknown parents, and a secret that destroyed his life since he was 16.

 

Their love for each other was undeniably unbreakable, despite of what Fallon calls “insta-love”, and despite of not being able to communicate with each other the entire year before and after every November 9. But when Fallon unexpectedly revealed Ben’s deepest, darkest secret, she started doubting whether it was real love that Ben felt for her. Her trust towards him suddenly evaporated, she began to live life like Ben never happened, and she felt every ounce of regret every day for loving him. Will their love reign despite of the hatred that had bear, or will Fallon completely forget Ben and forever make him regret for the rest of their lives?

 

This book hooked my heart, BIG TIME – probably because of what my love life went through? It taught me that real love really is worth the wait and, the one who really loves you will accept all of your scars and flaws because to him/her, you are perfect. It made me realize that true love shouldn’t be rushed because before finding true love, one must first find oneself. Ben and Fallon proved to me that true love does exist – with the right person, at the right place, in the right time. It gives me hope for my future relationship  😜

 

F*ck Love

 

Contrast is important in life. We understand what light is because we can compare it with what we know is dark. Sweet is made sweeter after we eat something bitter. It’s the very same with sadness. And it’s important to experience sadness, to embrace it in order to truly know happiness. I was just a flat line until he came along. And maybe now I’m hurting. But isn’t that what love is supposed to do? Make you feel, make you brave, make you look at yourself noticing. Rich and sad.

Author: Tarryn Fisher

Rating: 4.9/5

Started on: January 18, 2016

Finished on: January 21, 2016

Edition: Kindle Edition

Genre: Romance, Contemporary

Synopsis:

Helena Conway has fallen in love.
Unwillingly. Unwittingly.
But not unprovoked.
Kit Isley is everything she’s not—unstructured, untethered,
and not even a little bit careful.
It could all be so beautiful … if he wasn’t dating her best friend.
Helena must defy her heart, do the right thing, and think of others.
Until she doesn’t.

 

“The best kind of love is the love that isn’t supposed to happened.” – Greer

 

F*ck Love is my very first book by Tarryn Fisher. I have NEVER read any of her books, nor knew her before getting this book. I had the urge to read it immediately because I was really hyped to start reading the ‘Never Never’ trilogy by her and Colleen Hoover [I’ll be posting a review for the trilogy too! Stay tuned *winks*]. Unlike other first time books from an unknown author, I grew love for Tarryn Fisher, making me want to read all of her books. She’s brilliant just like that!

 

 

 

The story started with Kit telling something to Helena, something he shouldn’t say to her especially that Kit is her best friend’s boyfriend. Their awkward conversation headed to them holding up a blue crayon, to them being in a house with their kids, Thomas and Brandi, until they ended up making love on a table. It was something Helena knew she wasn’t supposed to do, but felt so good…and so right.

 

Then she woke up – in a car parked outside the restaurant where she’s supposed to meet his boyfriend, Neil, her best friend Della, and her best friend’s boyfriend, Kit Isley.

 

And that dream changed her life forever.

 

She started doing things she never did, thought the way she shouldn’t think, and fell in love with a person she’s not allowed to fall in love with. Helena was indeed living in a nightmare. A complete hell of a nightmare. Until her impulsive decisions made sense, until her heart started to fill with glee, until she and her dearest had a forbidden love against her best friend ever since.

 

Is this another dream of Helena? Is their love story really the focus or just a part of Della and Kit’s?

 

 

As what I’ve said (or typed) earlier, I really loved this novel, and Tarryn Fisher. However, if you had noticed, it lacked 0.1 star for it to be a 5 star. And no I am not a hard-to-please kind of book nerd. I loved this novel, but there were still some flaws for me.

It was a love triangle gone terribly wrong. I admit I hated various wrong timing scenes, especially when other people, like Muslim, came in the picture. Nevertheless, the epilogue made me feel a lot better. A lot better. Like if I have to make a graph to show what I loved about this novel, it would look like this:

Well anyway, my reasons for loving and not liking the book aren’t important. What’s important is F*ck Love is a brilliant novel and I’m hoping every bookworms could read this! I know a physical copy of this book is hard to find, but as what Kit Isley said,

“Nothing worth finding is actually easy to find.”

 

My Heart and Other Blackholes by Jasmine Warga

 

Rating: 4.3/5

My Heart and Other Blackholes by Jasmine Warga was the first book that was removed from my very loooooooonnngggg TBR list this 2016. [making my goodreads Reading Challenge a 1/30 yaayyy]. I picked up this book because I terribly miss my copy of The Catastrophic History of You and Me by Jess Rothenberg and I was badly craving for suicidal-themed books. And even though Aysel wasn’t able to completely replace Brie as my most-favorite-character-of-all-time, I still loved her dearly, and related to her as well.

This novel by Jasmine Warga is about the sixteen year old physics geek, Aysel, who wanted to end her life due to problems from the past. However, despite her depression, she has no capability to actually kill herself because she’s too afraid. Luckily she discovers a site named “Smooth Passages” where there’s a section called Suicide Partners – a perfect solution to Aysel’s problem. There, she finds FrozenRobot, or commonly known as Roman, a seventeen year old guy who’s haunted by a family tragedy. As the days crawl nearer their “death date”, they were able to slowly fill in the broken lives of each other, until Aysel starts to think whether ending her life would really make her happy; if she’d let the black slug (who did nothing but eat all her feelings and make her depression worse) win, or let herself be stronger than the sadness that’s surrounding her heart.

I loved how this book was able to explain how depression really works – how it takes over your happiness life, how it makes you feel so worthless and hopeless, and how it invites its best friend, suicidal thoughts. I loved how love saved Roman and Aysel from killing theirselves and wasting the lives that was given to them. I loved how the book rotated on the main characters’ lovelife, family, friends, and problems a lot of teenager faces. But what I loved most about My Heart and Other Blackholes was how the author showed how depression can be defeated, and proved that being stronger than the black slug is POSSIBLE if one chooses to.

DO NOT READ THIS PART IF YOU HATE SPOILERS. PLEASE I DO NOT WANT TO DIE BECAUSE I SPOILED YOU.

First, I really didn’t appreciate the fact that Aysel’s parents got divorced when she was merely a year old. I mean, I know divorce is common in the United States. But stories with divorced parents doesn’t really make me…”happy”. Specially when the book itself is sad enough. Yes it’s a petty reason. *cries*

Second, it felt like the story was rushed during its last five to seven chapters. Everything suddenly crashed, then fell to its proper places in a blink of an eye.

Lastly, the side of Aysel’s dad was never told, nor did Aysel had a chance to face him. All we knew was that he was moved from jail to a mental institute. Her dad will remain a mystery I guess…unless Jasmine Warga decides to make a sequel that talks about Aysel’s parents, from how they met to being married to being divorced to having a murderer ex-husband (or whatever sequel that will explain his side because seriously I am dying to know what’s going on his mind before, during, and after that incident).

Well that’s about it. I hope everyone who’s depressed (or is trying to avoid depression), or is just searching for an  inspiration gets a chance to read this page turner!

Thank You 2015, I’m Ready 2016

 

Like any other years, 2015 gave me a thrilling yet enjoyable roller coaster ride. However, this is the most extreme one so far – the happiest and saddest year ever.

2015 was the year I graduated from high school, and entered college. This was the year where I felt the pain when a loved one had to leave you to go abroad, twice. The year where I was able to discover myself more, and I saw the deeper parts of me.

2015 was the year where I had a deeper connection with books (thanks to bookstagram and all the wonderful people present in that community), photography, and self-discovery.  I was able to reborn the photographer and writer wannabe in me, slowly but surely.

Wonderful people also came into (and left) my life last year – the ones who had caused great pain in my heart, and the ones who brightened up my day. I admit, I miss some of the people who left me (who wouldn’t?) but as they say, life must go on, with or without them.

[This hit me hard like the iceberg on RMS Titanic. Ouch]

Several experiences also came by to punch me in the face, forced me to grow, and made me a better person. Yes, they hurt but I have no regrets! Facing them made me the person I am today – braver, smarter, wiser, stronger, and has more faith in our Lord God.

2015 became my biggest battlefield in life. I battled with my own thoughts, my heart, my emotions, my depression, my wallet, my family, my friends, my teachers, my wants, the temptations in my life, and my sleep (because college won’t stop as long as you’re getting sleep, and books too). Yet again, I have no regrets.

Now that 2016 had arrived and is little by little crawling over our life for 366 days, I can proclaim that I am more prepared for the upcoming trials and kicks life’s gonna give me, than I was last year. Although I do wish this year would shower me with tons of encouragement and motivation so my resolutions would be achieved *crosses fingers*.

In The Shadow Of Blackbirds by Cat Winters

Rating: 4.2/5

1918 was the worst year for every American. Especially for the sixteen year old girl, Mary Shelley Black. With her father caught by the German soldiers, her childhood sweetheart dead, and her paranoid aunt living with onions to prevent the flu from hitting them, she’s more than desperate to give up on life and go back to being a child, or let herself get struck by lightning. But then a mystery haunts her and makes her eager to solve the puzzle — Stephen’s ‘heroic’ death. Ever since their visit to his funeral, Stephen’s spirit visits her everyday and asks her to not let him go and help him to seek peace. Mary Shelley was determined to help him. He was her first love, and he’s scaring her to death. With her inherited knowledge from her physician mother and the love for science, she unfolds the darkest secret regarding Stephen Ember’s death.

A very well-written paranormal/history book by Cat Winters! I love how I traveled through more than a century ago and how mind blowing the plot twist is! Although I sort of expected it, I was still shocked how irrelevantly correct I am. Thought I’m quite intrigued with how the other characters’ lives ended. Was her father able to seek freedom? Did they return to Portland? Was Aunt Eva able to find another man for her? What happened to Julius and Mr. Darning? To Gracie and Grant? Did Mrs. Embers recover? So many unanswered questions yet I still consider it a fantastic read! Just wished the illustrations wasn’t that scary.

 

Eleanor & Park

Rating: 4.1/5

I first read the book last October 25, 2015 and finished it on October 27, 2015. It wasn’t too heavy nor too light. This book made me feel the right amount of fluff and sadness. Also fear. Seriously, who didn’t fear Richie? (Park Sheridan, of course)

I have already read this book twice.. And I do not regret anything. Following Eleanor’s weirdness and Park’s awesomeness and braveness was really worth the late-night-reading and not-listening-to-the-class-reading. I loved how they fell for each other slowly and then all at once. How their love literally began from scratch to ‘true love’. I loved how Park faced Eleanor’s problems with her and how eager he was to make her feel that she’s special; that she’s art.

“Eleanor was right. She never looked nice. She looked like art, and art wasn’t supposed to look nice; it was supposed to make you feel something.”
― Park Sheridan, Eleanor & Park by Rainbow Rowell

I loved how sexy and tender the words in this book were written together in the most beautiful sequence. However, I did have a huge peoblem on the ending. It was undeniably satisfying and open ended at the same time and I loved-hated it! I do wish that Rainbow Rowell showed how Eleanor and Park ended up together at Minnesota or somewhere, if ever they actually did end up together. (because I totally think they should marry each other).

 

Being Alone In A Crowded Room

It’s been five months since my first day in college, and within that span of time, I barely have friends.

Maybe because I’m an introvert or I suck at conversations or because socializing isn’t my thing. Whatever the reason may be, having almost no friends at all while everyone’s with someone really sucks. You feel so left out and life emphasizes the word alone to your face too much it hurts.

I wondered, what if I become like him? What if I copy the way she talks? What if I pretend to be someone I’m not? Just to make things work for me, just to make me happy. I tried to be a different person. However, it still didn’t make things better.

Becoming a lonely person in a university where everyone would look awkwardly at you is indeed irritating. They look at you with pity, disgust, or whatever. It hurts. But being alone has it’s perks.

1. You get to know yourself better.
2. You won’t be an a-hole like the other kids – having their peers make them have sex, do drugs, cut class, or be extremely rude and irresponsible.
3. Appreciating the little things will be so easy for you (mostly because you have no choice)
4. You’ll be able to understand people better.
5. More time for reading, playing outside games or online games,  studying, writing, drawing, programming, or simply developing yourself.
6. It will teach you on how to not settle for less and how to not depend your happiness or anything to others.
7. You’ll highly appreciate it when true friends come along.

These are the things that I have learned through the past months. And I am more than happy to let you know that being alone, made me a better person. Not so happy like other people but I developed and that’s the most important thing in life!

I hope I was able to help!
Carpe diem!